Shit My Husband Says

It’s Five o’clock Somewhere Edition

We got a Ninja blender the week this gem was doled out… and the dollar store had CHEAP (obvs) Pina Colada mix.

M (in the man den): What are you doing?

J (in the kitchen): making a fried egg sandwich

M: oh, I thought you were making pina coladas. 😦

J: It’s ten o’clock in the morning! 😐

M: So? We’re adults. We can drink  at ten o’clock in the morning.

J: No.

*Now, this clearly makes me wonder what about frying an egg sounded like blending up a pina colada. Does this say something about my cooking or his hearing??*

xx Jenna

 

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Shit My Husband Says

Duck Edition

We drove by a mother duck and five or so ducklings today on our way home from Costco…

M: I’d like to eat them.

J: WHAT!?  Why!?

M: No, no. Not the babies,  just the mother duck

J: But what about the babies? They would die.

M: I would take them home.  They could live in the bathtub.

J: What about the cats?

M:  We have a door.

J: Why don’t we get a phantom screen so we can keep the cats out but still see the ducks? Also, what would you feed them?

M: Good idea! You know duck food….

 

xx Jenna

 

Shit My Husband Says

Bunny Edition

This popped up on my Facebook memories from last year, so I thought I would share it here for your enjoyment.

After having some sort of discussion about rabbits (or this was randomly brought up, I  can’t remember – yes, that is a possibility)

M: *sighs* They have hard lives,  man

J: Who? Bunnies?

M: Yeah. Wild bunnies have tough lives. Everything is a predator. All they want to do is have a yummy carrot and the farmer is putting up fences and trying to shoot them. All they want is a delicious carrot. 😦

 

xx Jenna